Noah Centineo plays an insufferable jerk in ‘The Perfect Date’: Review

The following is a spoiler-free review of Netflix’s The Perfect Date.

Of all the boys I’ve loved before, Brooks Rattigan isn’t one of them.

At first, Netflix’s The Perfect Date seems like a delightful companion to the rom-com hit To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. Noah Centineo — aka internet boyfriend and TATBILB heartthrob Peter Kavinsky — stars as Brooks Rattigan, an ambitious teenager willing to do anything to go to his dream school, Yale. 

To raise money for tuition, Brooks launches an app that can help pair him up with girls in need of the perfect date. Customers fill out the app’s criteria and create a made-to-order boyfriend out of the young entrepreneur. Brooks dons costumes, tries out accents, and otherwise makes the most of this pseudo-27 Dresses format.

Of course, Brooks’s service isn’t aimed at finding true love — and it certainly isn’t sex work (a point the film felt the need to make many times over, for some reason). Rather, the purpose of the app is to make it look like Brooks is dating whomever he is out with. Ultimately, he falls for one of his customers.

Sounds a whole lot like TATBILB, right? Well, beyond the casting and fake date premise, little about The Perfect Date lives up to that other film’s charm. Instead of offering up a cautionary tale on the perils of false affection or a cute look at teen romance in 2019, The Perfect Date delivers a portrait of an insufferable, entitled jerk of a teen boy in desperate need of some serious parenting. 

It’s not Centineo’s fault that Brooks sucks so much. Brooks Rattigan (ugh, that name) is about as two-dimensional as a character can get, and no amount of Centineo charisma can save him.

Brooks likes cars, sports, money, girls, and the Ivy League. He dislikes feeling unpopular, boring, and not special. He idolizes Steve Jobs, Michael Jordan, and Elon Musk. Brooks wants to change the world, but he just doesn’t know how he’s going to do it! Imagine the most basic version of a privileged teenage boy and yeah, you’ve got Brooks.

But dull stereotypes aren’t what make Brooks such an abominable douchey character. It’s the terrible way he treats nearly everyone else in this thin story, and then gets rewarded for that behavior. 

It’s not Noah Centineo’s fault that Brooks sucks.

An example: Brooks’s relationship with his dad. Charlie Rattigan, played by Matt Walsh, is a down-on-his-luck writer, reeling from his recent divorce and a mountain of career setbacks. He’s depressed, frustrated, and deeply concerned for his son, since he’s not sure paying for Yale is a real possibility for their family. Charlie instead encourages Brooks to consider going to the University of Connecticut, a more affordable option.

Brooks doesn’t react well to that suggestion, ultimately mocking his dad’s unemployment and asserting his superiority, saying, “Look. I’m sorry, I just haven’t worked my ass off for the past three and a half years to go to a public college.” Yeah… okay, dude

Brooks eventually evolves beyond this elitist perspective, but it doesn’t excuse the fact this condescending outburst goes largely unpunished. Later in the movie, Charlie even commends Brooks for pursuing his goals so tenaciously, entirely forgetting the horrible interaction and jokingly offering to sell one of his kidneys for Brooks’s Yale tuition. It’s a comically repulsive scene, devoid of any moral comeuppance.

"No, thanks."

“No, thanks.”

Brooks isn’t the only shallow character in this exhausting story. His dueling love interests Shelby and Celia, played by Riverdale‘s Camila Mendes and Laura Marano, get written into similar corners. (Celia likes combat boots and Shelby likes money… but they both like Brooks?! Gasp!)

Oh, and Brooks’ best friend, Murph (Odiseas Georgiadis)? Well, he’s the closest to a multi-dimensional character this story has, but ultimately gets relegated to an underwhelming B-plot. (Brooks’s app is taking up a lot of his time, and Murph is angry about being bailed on so much. But then Brooks apologizes and Murph is totally okay with it. The end.)

In short, The Perfect Date is far from perfect, and won’t scratch the TATBILB itch fans have been struggling with since last August. To see the real Peter Kavinsky — and not this cheap impostor — we’ll just have to wait for P.S. I Still Love You, due out next year. Bye, Brooks!

Uploads%252fvideo uploaders%252fdistribution thumb%252fimage%252f90996%252f469a5d35 a652 4f88 9b83 3dbfb8ce3787.jpg%252foriginal.jpg?signature=t5bkuqv1c  itp cf hdv4xxkpq=&source=https%3a%2f%2fblueprint api production.s3.amazonaws

Source

more recommended stories

  • 'Game of Thrones' season 8 episode 2 recap – Winterfell preps for their biggest battle yet

    Everyone’s preparing for the impending battle.

  • Online project management training that can help boost your career

    Just to let you know, if.

  • Raising Kratos’ Sony documentary gets a trailer: Watch

    Sony Santa Monica’s critically and commercially.

  • World rocked by revelation that Goombas have arms and hands

    Not since Mario’s nipples has the.

  • Teen YouTubers who faked a pregnancy apologize — and offer bad sex ed advice

    Two teenage YouTubers were the subject.

  • Amazon devices, Philips juicers, Microsoft tablets, Kenwood mixers, and more on sale for April 18 in the UK

    The bank holiday weekend is almost.

  • Microsoft refused to sell facial recognition tech to law enforcement

    The potential for abuse of facial.

  • Google Pay can import airline miles, reward points, and more from Gmail now

    KRAKOW, POLAND – 2018/08/27: Fifty and.

  • ‘Game of Thrones’ premiere featured cameos from ‘It’s Always Sunny’ and ‘Silicon Valley’

    Spoiler warning: If you’re not caught.

  • 3 ways to combat climate change according to young activists

    Young people have a lot more.

  • Internet Explorer exploit lets hackers steal data even if you never it

    Even if you never open Internet.

  • Juul sets up a web portal for narcing on vaping teens

    Don’t be a bad teen.Image: Suzanne.

  • Mike Gravel’s campaign is proof that more politicians need meme tutors

    In the age of surrealist memes.

  • A guide to roasting Bran Stark in ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 8

    sBran Stark sucks, but you don’t.

  • Instagram cracks down on ‘inappropriate’ content

    Instagram is making changes to its.

  • How did NASA create its own pretty artificial auroras? Rockets, of course.

    These artificial auroras are arguably as.

  • Don’t hold your breath for that 16-inch MacBook Pro

    Apple’s 16-  or 16.5-inch MacBook Pro.

  • K-pop Twitter can’t tell which way BTS’ Jimin is facing in this new video clip

    There’s nothing the internet loves more.

  • Shadows Die Twice’ and difficulty vs. accessibility

    For anyone who’s been paying attention.

  • Watch hilarious ‘Game of Thrones’ sketches from ‘Saturday Night Live’

    Jon Snow may know nothing, but.

  • Best wireless charging mats 2019 (RIP AirPower, we hardly knew you)

    The Choetech wireless charging pad is.

  • Snapchat gets upgrade with gaming platform and new features

    Snapchat is trying to stay alive.

  • Elon Musk is still Tesla CEO — for now

    Tesla CEO Elon Musk had his.

  • Lincoln Aviator SUV returns with 28-speaker sound system

    Disclosure Every product here is independently.

  • ‘Game of Thrones’ star Emilia Clarke describes what it’s like to survive a brain haemorrhage

    Emilia Clarke recently penned an op-ed.

  • The three most popular Netflix shows in the U.S.

    HighSpeedInternet looked at the top shows.

  • Best and worst April Fools jokes from big tech companies in 2019

    Big tech companies continued the tradition.

  • Facebook will give you more info about why certain posts show up in your News Feed

    Facebook is adding a feature to.

  • This massive online course sale is meant to help you live your best life

    Your time is valuable and limited.

  • Tom Hiddleston’s Chinese Centrum ad is a real wild ride

    It was brought to the internet’s.

  • Dad delivers impromptu performance of ‘Ave Maria’ for his daughter at Disney World

    There are some things in life.

  • GoFundMe donates to GoFundMe that’s trolling another GoFundMe

    We forgive you if you’re feeling.